Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend,
Common Sense,
who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since
his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated
such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
Why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair;
and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies
(don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies
(adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned
but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a6-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;
and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked
teachers for doing the job that they themselves had
failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were
required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion
or an aspirin to a student;
but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant
and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the
religious organizations became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't
defend yourself from a burglar
in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live,
after a woman failed to realize that a
steaming cup of coffee was hot.
She spilled a little in her lap,
and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents,
Truth and Trust, by his spouse, Discretion, by
his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights, I Want It Now,
Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim
Not many attended his funeral
because so few realized he was gone.
If you still remember him, pass this on.
If not, join the majority and do nothing!
Common Sense,
who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since
his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated
such valuable lessons as:
Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
Why the early bird gets the worm;
Life isn't always fair;
and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies
(don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies
(adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned
but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a6-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate;
teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch;
and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked
teachers for doing the job that they themselves had
failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were
required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion
or an aspirin to a student;
but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant
and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the
religious organizations became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't
defend yourself from a burglar
in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live,
after a woman failed to realize that a
steaming cup of coffee was hot.
She spilled a little in her lap,
and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents,
Truth and Trust, by his spouse, Discretion, by
his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers;
I Know My Rights, I Want It Now,
Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim
Not many attended his funeral
because so few realized he was gone.
If you still remember him, pass this on.
If not, join the majority and do nothing!
No comments:
Post a Comment