Am I still the way I think I feel?
I’m wondering this now.
It seems less complicated now,
More surreal, less like reality.
More like the dream I keep having.
The dream I wanted to come true,
More than anything else.
How can I trust this new reality?
I’m staring at my new world
And I don’t recognize any of it.
I don’t know how I got here,
I can’t remember the steps.
Trust has never been my forte.
My worlds are colliding in my mind,
Balancing outside of me.
This is too real, too scary.
I’m finally getting what I’ve always wanted,
I just don’t know how.
Will it stay together and complete?
I fear not, it never has before,
The pieces always seem to come loose,
Apart and then lost.
The picture doesn’t stay the same,
Always changing, maybe that’s good.
I want to understand where my world is going.
I want to see the path before me,
All I can see is what’s behind,
Success and fortunate circumstances.