Wednesday, May 12, 2010

I think I found a cure?? & Happy Late Mom's Day ....

I kinda skipped over Mother's day altogether this year. I did my daughter and sisterly duties and I called and wished to my sis and step-mom on Saturday but I also broke the unsure news to them as well. Along with all my friends, they are now waiting in the lurch for my medical news (which I should state I don't have officially from my doctor).

Any way, feet are back to their normal shape and size and seem to be staying there, so far today!!!!!!!
I keep checking them to make sure :) I noticed it last night and confirmed with my roommate Mariya. It was quite the happy occasion - I wish I had some cake or a cookie or something to celebrate!! When I weighted myself this morning - I've lost 6 pounds in 6 days!! I wish fat weight came off as quickly as water weight ;}

So for my sister's Mother's Day 'gift', I sent her copies of letters my mother wrote to her BFF Marilyn George. Marilyn had given these to me way back in 2006 when I sent the day with her. They aren't sad until you closer to mom's death date and then they really pull hard on the heart and tears flow fast and free! I hope my poor sister is prepared for this, maybe she won't have the same reaction, I don't know. Her and I have different memories of that time and event, of course! She was only 6yrs old when Mom got sick and 11 when she passed, I on the hand was 11 and 16 when she died.

It's interesting there is a letter from my Aunt Sheila in the collection as well and she describes the funeral to Marilyn in minor detail. There is one part where she is talking about me and all my friends who came and how I finally broke down when they wouldn't stop hugging me. I remember this very clearly, I never felt so loved and cared for by my friends. I remember after the funeral at the grave site, the rain had held off all day, then as I was sitting there on the ground (with Benji Nilsson, I think) waiting for them to put her into the hole they had dug, it started to pour down - the heavenly literally opened up and drenched us. I let the rain absorb my tears and let go for the first time since I had gotten the news that fateful Thursday night, April 20th, at 9:03pm. I remember when Benji and I got back to my house, all I wanted to do was be normal and go play with my friends. I went down to my room, changed my clothes and left all the mourners and well wishers in my house and shut them away. I went to my friend Paul Seely's house and met up with my friends, we jumped on his trampoline and tried to be normal. We would never be normal again! My friends had no idea how to talk to me or be around me and I slowly closed down and then off. Our friendships became very superficial. It's only been recently that I've understood these reactions and that it wasn't anyone's fault. None of us were equipped to handle what was going on in our town, our lives. I recently reunited of sorts on FaceBook with several of them and it feels so nice to hear from then and share the goings on in our lives again. Can I say how grateful I am for FaceBook?? It feels funny & weird to say but is' so true!

That's all for now - I'm feelings teary and I'm at work :}

Thursday, May 6, 2010

So I didn't find Prince Charming but .....

I did go to the doctor finally regarding my feet issues. They have been swollen since I started this job here at Occidental Petroleum (Oxy). We ruled out Thyroid issues and he put me on diuretic medication. I started today, so we will see what happens. He also thinks it may be Diabetes Type 2, I have to back for a Glucose test in a couple of weeks.

Sidenote: I am typing this without looking at my fingers!!! Yay ME!!! I'm finally learning how to type and I 'm getting better - although I still use the back button -- but less often!

Back to it: Also started working for the US Census Board doing Enumeration (counting people) so far so good! I'm hoping it will help me to loose some weight and get me back in better shape.

As for the Conference -- it was OK, but my poor feet were hurting so much I didn't have much fun at all. The Sunday sacrament was interesting -- they talked A LOT about not getting down on yourself for being single and lowering your expectations. Which for me wasn't really an issue - just kiddin'! I know I'm awesome and I need someone who not only realizes that but can be OK with it! NO! Love IT!!

I am a daughter of GOD and will not settle for a man who doesn't know it and doesn't treat me that way!! It's funny, I've been in the Young Women's now for just over a year and I teach these amazing young girls all the things I keep forgetting!! Maybe that's why I'm charged with teaching them!

I need to do better though -- I am not perfect and I know it : )